March 25, 2012

Let's Play Ziggurat





It was the beginning of times. It was the end of times.


Some called me T.O.M.: the omega man. But I go by Tim. What good's a name, anyway, when there is no one left to call you by it? The only friend I have left is my gun, and she can't talk. Or, rather, the only word she knows is goodbye. Her name is Chain Reaction. But I call her Betty. I always wanted a girl named Betty.


She speaks to them for me. You know, the robots, the androids, the cyborgs, the whatever. The Freaks. The Freaks killed everyone else, and now they're after me.  


We had a plan once. We built the Ziggurats, and there was supposed to be a warrior on top of each. Sometimes, I can feel them. The others. Up in the air with me playing king of the mountain for as long as it took. And when one fell, another would replace him. Shredding up Freaks like a never-ending guitar solo. 


Well, that plan went to shit.


And now it's just me, Betty, and the empty Ziggs in the distance.


This here is your basic Freak, the jumper. The cannon fodder vanguard. He jumps high and slow, and will fire if you let him get close enough. When I charge Betty up, the explosion causes surrounding Freaks to explode as well. 


One charged shot takes out these four Freaks.



This Freak here is the Walker. The dumbest of the bunch. He just walks up the Zigg. As if he would ever get to me. Some folks liked to drop non-charged shots down the Zigg at the Walker. Get him while he's real low. But that don't make no sense. I like to use the Walker as my own personal bomb. I let him get to the top, and then . . . .


Clears the whole side for me. 





Look who decided to show up to the party. The Big Freak himself. 


Betty and I know what to do. 


We've been working together for so long, we just have this amazing friction together. There's no other way to describe it.


She blows a wind in my hair to tell me she loves me. I kill the Freaks to show her I love her. 








There are other Freaks too: the High Jumper, the Buzz Saw, and the Mother Ship. 


None shall pass.


As the Sun sets, the Moon rises. Maybe, just maybe, I take out enough before they get to me. Enough to make sure they are never a threat again. Enough to give some other life form time to prepare.  Enough to make a footnote in their log. 

Enough, enough, enough.

























It was the end of times. It was the beginning of times.



























































February 25, 2012

The Steam Machine Stops





M1: Oh! Someone is calling me. I haven't received a call in ages!

M1: "Check before accept!" as the Machine says.



M1: Hmmm, a stranger. I won't accept the call. Let's see the news today.



M1: There we are.




M1: So much progress in the world today! It pleases me. Let's see how my old friends are doing.





M1: What's this? Another call request? I wonder who it could be. Let me accept this time.


S1: Mother, thank you for accepting this call.

M1: Son! Why didn't you show up on my call list?

S1: This is an encrypted channel.

M1: Encrypted?! Don't you know that's illegal?

S1: I want to play a game with you, Mother.

M1: Why, of course, but why couldn't you send a friend request like a normal person? Are you feeling well, Son?

S1: Are you my friend, Mother?

M1: Why, of course. Don't be ridiculous. I'm on your list.

S1: Nothing more?

M1: What on Earth do you mean?

S1: I have many friends, but no way to send a Mother request.

M1: Stop playing semantics, Son. You know what I mean.

S1: I want to play a game--

M1: I already said--

S1: --not through the Machine.

M1: . . . 

S1: . . . 

M1: Not through the Machine?

S1: Yes.

M1: How on Earth would we do that? Is this an idea you received from your father? I warned you ab--

S1: Father is dead, Mother. When was the last time y--

**DISCONN-DISCONN**

M1: Oh, dear. When was the last time I talked with Father? I surely haven't let that much time go by. I've just been busy with my new friends. Why is my stomach hurting? Let me play, and it will pass.

M1: Oh look, here is a game I've been waiting to play.


M1: He looks just like Father! I'm sure the Machine knows of my bereavement and has planned accordingly.



M1: THANK YOU. THANK YOU.












M1: Another encrypted call.


S1: Mother.

M1: Son, I have been thinking these last days about your idea. It is new. It is dangerous.

S1: The Machine cannot go on forever.

M1: Of course not, but why should it stop now? Why should we prepare now?

S1: If not us, then who? If not now, then when?

M1: How should we play together not through the Machine?

S1: Side-by-side, two-by-two, as God intended.

M1: You are a fool to put words in God's mouth while you blaspheme the Machine as well.

S1: I am your Son.

M1: I will ignore that impertinent remark. Suppose we could play side-by-side, what if you lose? You could easily overpower me. I could not block you.

S1: Did you not set the specifications for me as a child? Did you not supervise?

M1: Those supervisions grew less frequent as you matured; it is natural. Besides, what could we play not through the Machine?

S1: The game is a bit simplistic, but it would be ours. The games we play through the Machine are not.

M1: Is that what this is all about?! You're one of them? You've fallen in with the Harbingers! Please. Let me show you what we can do through the Machine. This is progress!





S1: The fact remains that these are not yours. The quantity is irrelevant. You do not know the whims of the Machine.

M1: The Machine's transparency is lauded daily. Here, have a look.







S1: You have not read these.

M1: Of course I haven't. The language is too sophisticated for me. There are those whose entire task bar is filled with sub-tasks related to reading and understanding the scripture of the Machine.

S1: These people, are they beholden to you?

M1: Of course.

S1: In what way?

M1: They have sworn to the group of which I am a member.

S1: How do they live?

M1: What business is that of mine? You speak of irrelevancy, but do not notice the same in your own words.

S1: Think on what would happen, Mother, if the Machine stopped.

M1: I will think on it as I am deleting you from my friend list. Do not call me on an encrypted channel again.
























January 30, 2012

Into the Lexicon: Hit Point Inflation

Hit Point Inflation: n. A rise in the total amount of life increments allotted to heroes and monsters, from one game to another in a series, that serves no in-game purpose because the extra granularity is not used.

"Why is hit point inflation such a good marketing tool?" "Because when the numbers go up, it means you are having more fun."


Final Fantasy















Final Fantasy XIII